Thursday, May 28, 2015

Hello there, friend,

On the walk home from school yesterday, my daughter told me that her kindergarten graduation is the last day of school, the same day as my tenth wedding anniversary. I asked her about it, but she didn't know much. All she knows is she's excited.

We talked a bit more about school and the summer, our forthcoming move and whether or not she'll be able to ride the bus next year. Then she asked if we were going on a vacation. I said, "No, we won't have a vacation this year because we are moving into the new house." And she was okay with that.

Sometimes I feel so relieved that she can now understand some things. I can explain and she gets it, in her six year-old way. Other times, I feel frustrated because she's still such a little girl and her understanding is limited. But I can see how she's transitioning into middle childhood, and I think a lot about what's ahead for us. I get excited and overwhelmed.

Still, I keep inviting her in. I want to let her see me, to be a part of what I do and who I am. "Come with me across the street so I can photograph the neighbors' peonies," I say. And she opens the gate and runs, arms open and hair streaming in the late evening sun. We smell the flowers and talk about their shapes, how they grow. And when we are done, we walk back across the street, this time holding hands.