Wednesday, August 19, 2015

Hello there, friend,

Last night, before putting her to bed, I pulled out the playing cards and sat on the couch with my daughter playing Go Fish and War. Music was playing in the background and my husband was busy bathing our son, who I could hear singing loudly to himself. I sat there, flipping over cards and looking around the living room, which is now painted and semi-decorated. And I thought, This kind of feels like home.

It was a stunning thought, one I didn't want to give too much attention for fear that I might lose that little bit of magic.

Since we moved, it has been so many sleepless nights and fights and struggles against the house and each other. I had no idea how comfortable we were in our last house. I thought we were more flexible, we could do anything, this would all be a snap (and when I say we, I mean me, of course). But it's like anything else -- the more you resist, the harder it is.

So, last night. Maybe it was how utterly exhausted I felt, or maybe it was because I could finally see progress, or maybe it was because I was simply enjoying my daughter. Whatever the reason, I finally let go and felt it -- that undeniable peace and rest of home.