Wednesday, December 16, 2015

Hello there, friend,

This morning my daughter was struggling, rebelling against what I was asking her to do, screaming, weeping. It was one of those times that felt a little traumatic, like once we got through it we were a little worse for wear but at least we made it. And we did. I eventually got her into the car to drive to school, with intentions of walking her to her classroom to make sure she was okay.

Unfortunately I was stonewalled at the office, told I couldn't walk my daughter to her classroom, and got into it with the principal who was insistent that she wanted to "work together." But I told her I didn't want to work with her; I just wanted to walk my daughter to her classroom. I wanted to give her a hug, and tell her I am here for her and that we are going to be okay. Finally the principal allowed just that, but not without me pointing out that what was going on with my family was none of her business.

So I've spent the better part of my day beating myself up, feeling like a less-than-acceptable mother, feeling like I'm too willing to engage in conflict, feeling like I should know better or be better than this. But did I do anything wrong? I sent my daughter into her day with love and told a woman who wanted to stand in my way to move. Maybe it's the mama bear inside me, but I think I did okay.